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[14 Nov 2009|10:43pm] |
Here comes that sunny feeling one gets when crossing paths with an energy a little (or a lot) better than one's self.
The hardest part is figuring out how to react. I suppose I shouldn't worry so much. I have love in my heart and enough to impart a little bit to everyone that I meet. It's in my nature to worry though. I have to fight it. I usually do a good job because I've been blessed with a strong will.
I don't want to be anything less then the best I can be for anyone. A lot of growing up has happened upon me in the last year.
Put your faith in me friends. I will someday return everything you've given to me back. Not because I think you want me to but because I want to. No matter what anyone thinks, I have become a more motivated individual and my love for the people I surround myself with, who have backed me up countless times, is motivating me to succeed. Also, my desire to abstain from my past douchyness is helping.
I just have to remember to take setbacks and failures and turn them into growth opportunities. I can do this.
It would be nice to be a little less lonely though. I would also like to increase the amount of fucking that goes on in my life.
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[06 Oct 2009|12:05am] |
about your car, fixable definitely
we'll make it graceful again like you are
it just hesitates temporarily
it's not how i drive it
i was just spending the day
tried to catch a moon at five
but the sun, the sky is just that way
about how long, will these freedoms wait for me?
about how long, will these changes take to feel like they have changed?
about how many, summers will i spend this way?
with the phone off the hook
at the pace of the rain
i'm not on your side
i realized yesterday
so dont ask me for a ride
no telling what i might say
because tonight i want out
unless you can show me another way
tonight i just want out
unless you can show me another way
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[04 Jun 2009|12:30am] |
everyone is fucked
also google wave looks to be extra special.
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[22 May 2009|05:39pm] |
i forgot about this user pic.
its so great!
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[17 May 2009|06:04am] |
good hell morning. whellcome to jack in the box.
i really shouldnt ever say anything on this stupid piece of shit.
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[08 May 2009|08:18pm] |
Was gonna go to the show tonight but my truck broke.
Having band practice instead.
I like writing songs with Caleb. He knows whats up.
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[01 May 2009|07:51am] |
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mustache mayhem is upon us.
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[20 Apr 2009|11:07pm] |
its 420 and i didnt get stoned today.
i wrote a killer guitar part instead.
also finished my fafsa application. looks like ill be goin to school in the fall.
what should i study with all this free ass grant money i get?
ill definitely take an english class. im to dumb for math right now. music theroy sounds good (bout time i really learned it). shit. what else is there even? computers i guess. but im pretty good at those already. or so i think?!
ive been takin 5-htp 400mg a day for the last 2 weeks and its AWESOME. recommended for all. waaaay better than any pharmaceutical "mood enhancer", though i guess i can really only make that judgement based off of illegal ones and prozac.
arena season 6 comes tomorrow! stoked to pwn hard with william.
maybe a musical band type deal coming soon?! 0_o?!!? (wish i knew more drummers)
thats all from the ted boles camp.
good night chiefer reefers.
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| a poem about writing a poem when your really tired. |
[06 Apr 2009|02:34am] |
solitary i sit
seemingly bereft
such quiet
a city of empty houses
standing shortly important
yet currently removed from all things
found, at least mildly in the sense of the word itself;
to be regarded as much more than initially conceived
the possibility of estuaries widened
wherein the flow could concurrently be perceived as trivial
like former expeditions into this wild land
i have found the prey
a story ended early for the benefit a labored soul
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[05 Apr 2009|10:18pm] |
i got sunburned today
how fuckin sweet is that?!
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[30 Mar 2009|08:30am] |
statement made by the guy why hit me to police.
i was being followed around by devil worshipers and demons and hells angels and i got enough of it and i struck on one of them. and i dont regret doing it.
turns out i got punched by a bum.
kind of a bummer in terms of being able to sue, but also joyfully hilarious.
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[28 Mar 2009|02:09am] |
im 25 today.
thats one quarter of a century.
in another entire life ill be 50.
my fuggin teeth hurt.
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[26 Mar 2009|10:02am] |
my birthday is on saturday.
no party tho. ill be to old for that shit.
i have these temporary like braces things on the top row of teeth that are holding the 2 that were knocked around in place until they either heal or die.
i have sooo much legal stuff to do now. i hope this guy has some money so i can take it away.
mah face hurts so bad. =(
plz can i haz moar drugz???
so i averted any major surgery for now but im not 100% in the clear yet.
sigh...
all cause some douchebag was so insecure that he felt he had to defend his ego against little old me.
i guess before it all went down he was kickin it in the back of the bar eating beans from a can for a while.
whats with weirdos and food? why do they all have odd eating habits? i was on a greyhound bus once and this really scraggly looking guy was blasting through some chicken wings like it was his last meal on earth. he had a beard, some VERY shifty eyes and was dressed like a woman. his last meal on earth should have been a salad tho. fuggin tubbo.
im going back to olympia today to record a statement for the police. say hi to me if you see me.
you probably wont see me.
maybe a stranger will say hi instead and ill just pretend its someone i know.
on the bright side of things i get to work for my aunt on my birthday. not that i love work or nothin. especially on my birthday. i do not, however, consider demolition to be work. tearing shit down is sooo fun.
im outta here with two birds flyin high yelling fuck the world
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| so tonight |
[25 Mar 2009|12:27am] |
my dad and i went to this bar in olympia we frequent for the open mic.
i went out side to smoke and this dude taps me on the shoulder, sucker punches me and pushes two of my teeth back (almost parallel with the roof of my mouth).
ill see what the dentist has to say but i might be looking at a bunch of oral surgery.
dude said i was trying to start shit with him all night but i did nothing of the sort.
i didnt get a chance to hit him back or anything (he just took off after one punch) but i think the 2nd degree felony assault charges will be suitable enough for my tastes.
im gonna go take a bath and let this vicodin lull me to sleep. well...not IN the bath.... after....in my bed.
fuckin hate people sometimes.
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[24 Mar 2009|05:07pm] |
almost 600 resilience. most of you dont know how sweet that is, but imagine if someone punched you in the face and you were to get a bloody nose. with resilience you instead receive a light tap.
cheap shot > mutilate > kidney shot > mutilate > mutilate > cold blood > eviscerate > dead.
unless its vs a ret pally. then they bubble, heal themselves and proceed to push my shit in.
or a dk. they get to wait till all thats done and still be at half heath and im boned.
same with warriors.
and dont get me started on frost mages.
maybe i should just learn to play.
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[21 Mar 2009|11:58pm] |
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who am i?
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[20 Mar 2009|04:05am] |
i cant really even describe the cascade. i am but a single piece. a small portion, maybe not so secretly wishing that i could be more delectable. yet nearly only for manifestations of my own flavor, or moreover how others may palette it and dwell upon its constitution.
im sorry. i really care but i cant express this for fear of being perceived as trite or merely a fool.
so much pain in these lives yet all i can manage is a self serving semblance of pseudo empathy. none deserve to have vested upon soul and heart, that which has come unto you.
under current circumstance this is the best i can muster. it may even be to much. i dont know. im just trying this out and if its wrong ill try to make it better.
stories criss and cross, weave and integrate, never caring about the consequence. im not saying i believe in destiny nor fate or anything else that can be similarly categorized as such. im just trying to find the good in every thing, every one and every situation. in those rare and shining places, i pray that we can all find at least a little bit to believe in.
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| bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks |
[14 Mar 2009|05:12pm] |
very classy.
maybe this is mean spirited but, fuck it, i dont give a shit.
besides putting on such a display was obviously intentional and pretty mean spirited in itself.
i puffed twice i suppose it was time to pass.
knotts berry farm cookies look like goatse.
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[04 Mar 2009|02:07pm] |
all has been revealed.
this is so meaningless
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